on my children

I follow some amazing business women on facebook and instagram who are incredibly open and generous in sharing pictures and stories of their children. I love to see them and admire their mamas openness in being so willing to family be so public.

I have thought long and hard about how I personally feel about my children being shared in the same way, and (as the business mamas I spoke of earlier have had to do) came to my own conclusion as to what worked best for our family. I did a whole lot of soul searching and really examined my beliefs about what I wanted for our children, and here’s what I came up with. They are too young to understand the magnitude of having their pictures and their identities on public social media. They don’t understand the repercussions of the possible long-term effects of having their faces and names known – and to be honest, we don’t really understand it either. We are living in the brave new world of social media and it’s a fantastic tool on both a personal and business level, but I can’t make the choice to join that world publicly for my children. I’m happy to share little stories every now and then about their lives, but their names and their faces don’t belong to me and I won’t be posting them.

I want to make it clear that I am in no way judging those whose children join them on their social media journeys – just as so much of parentinng is about making the choice which best suits your family, this decision is about what suits us best.  I feel like a bit of a hypocrite for enjoying watching these instagram babies grow when I’m clutching mine so tightly to my chest, but I think it’s just one of those ‘I’ll do me, you do you’ things.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject – am I being overprotective? Do you have beliefs about children in a public forum?

xx

12 thoughts on “on my children

  1. I post pictures of CJ on social media but they are certainly not the full picture, so to speak. CJ is not what he’s generally called IRL and I’m careful to only share images and stories that wouldn’t embarrass him terribly in future- no nudity, etc. As he gets older, I’ll consistently reassess the situation too – what works for us now won’t always work for us and that’s cool.

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    1. It’s such a tricky line to tiptoe along! We’ve all got to find the way the works best for our families – sounds like you’ve found what works for you. And just to be a hypocrite -I love reading about CJ and his adventures! x

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  2. I think you do what is best for you, I don’t think its over protective at all – i share my children BUT I have 3 and the eldest only appears occasionally (its his choice)

    I don’t judge you for not sharing them, just like you don’t judge me for sharing mine x

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    1. I love that you’ve found a way to share your children that’s respectful of their wishes and works for you! It just occurred to me that the ‘thing’ with blogging and social media is that our decisions and ways of life are accessible to other people in a way that’s never really happened before. It makes it so easy to judge and question and I love when this experience happens instead….we just respect each other’s stance. Thanks Lisa! x

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  3. I don’t think you are being over protective at all. Too many parents don’t stop to think about the digital footprint they are creating for the little ones before they even have any say in the matter.

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  4. I think you are making a very wise decision and more people should probably think it through a little more closely too – I am one who does share photos of my two, but I do get their permission as not worth the wrath of an upset teenager to post something they do not want out there. It wasn’t a conscious choice I made though.

    The reason I believe in every word you said is because I know of employers who may like someone in their CV, but as soon as they look at their social media pages, they will not even interview the person based on the judgement of a few posts. If we are posting photos of our children now, imagine employers gaining a WHOLE LIFE HISTORY before they even begin. A little privacy is a good thing. Children and young adults may not completely understand the full gravity of what they share now and how it may impact their lives later on.

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    1. It’s all such a new world really, and I’m not certain enough of it to put my babies out there. I do share the odd pic on my personal facebook page, but they are few and far between (and the kids are always clothed..) but I’m uncomfortable with putting them on my business profiles. I guess that’s where I’ve drawn my line. They can choose differently when they are old enough to do so, although the thought of Miss 5 and duckface selfies isn’t doing a lot for me! x

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  5. I think this is a really important decision to make, I personally have my own boundaries when it comes to what we share online and I think it’s really important to define those. I did a post about the things I will never share online so both my family and I feel completely comfortable with those. As you said it’s nothing to judge each other on it’s a personal decision that differs with every family and every situation.

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